This is to all people that expressed the interest in the order, and that considered joining at one time or another.

When I joined DR months ago, I was already high charged and pissed at the events that transpired in Shard. I was because Sally, my wife (who I wasnt' yet married to at the time), had been playing in and telling me about Elanthia for years... I fell in love with all the things I love now, like the elothean race, Illithi and Shard, and the works of the Fyearikloa'i Rensh'a BEFORE I was in the game. She managed to communicate her enthusiasm to me when we talked about these things, and it made me want to be a part of it too.

She was the one who suggested that we should fight for Illithi, or at least try to make a difference. She mentioned that she would have loved to be involved with the Fyearikloa'i Rensh'a if it was still around, since she had been following their work for years... She is the one that came up with the idea of trying to continue their work in some way, because now she knew I cared as much as she did. This was to be our work together, not just me alone. However, because none of her characters at the moment want to be "leader" types if you will, we thought that Alexsei would have to push things sometimes, and be more assertive. But that still was the project we were to do together, as a team.

However, my ways of doing things have changed that. I took what we said and applied it to my own visions of things, which have led to conflict in the initial plans... I took the words close to heart and thought I could shake things by setting up the basis of an order. But that was not the original idea to give a name to it. It was more supposed to be a movement than an order. But by going forward with this, I put Alexsei at the forefront, while his role was never as the instigator of it - he was just stepping forward, but everything he came to love was first and foremost a vision and a project of Sally.

Which brings me to now, and actually having a few people contacting me about the order. But it leaves a bad taste in my mouth, because I realize that in this big quest to change things, Sally and her characters were left behind. I went and published things too soon, and a lot of things were done without me even consulting her, to the point where this became a separate entity from the effort we were trying to put together. And it was never meant to be that way. It was never meant to be MY thing, because all I did was extrapolate on an idea she held close to her heart, and we wanted to accomplish together.

This is long, but the point is, I am really feeling bad because people have contacted me about these things, about my caring of Shard, while Sally did as much in game as I ever did, almost without a word of acknowledgment being said to her... I have underexposed her role, and even if I talk about her characters at length in my posts about the order thing, the fact is I feel like I am the only one being contacted for things that should also involve her.

This is my mistake and the only thing I really want is for us to work at it together like we used to, like this was supposed to be. So for now, the Elota'i Ailirelitan'a will remain only in the form of an idea. I would feel that this is cheating for me to go on and do this on my own when this was not a plan she fully agreed with. Don't get me wrong, we still care deeply about Shard and Ilithi and still want to make a difference there. We plan to do more of the work in game from now on, without a name or structure to go by, until we are better prepared to organize our efforts and the people involved, if such an organization is necessary. We still want to meet people that are interested and caring about the situation in Ilithi, and want to make a difference... We still are bent on helping anyway we can, in our own way. This just feels like I have been jumping the gun and forgot what was important...

More than anything, any effort that are made should not be "I" but "we". All this backstory to say it is not my effort but OUR effort and I don't want to reap the credit that is not due to me. Ryshassa, her sister Atmadja, Talliska the prydaen ranger and others, who are all played by Sally (though she would rather they be treated as seperate people IC) have made progress with the few people we talked to in game, and they are not given credit while I have been contacted for the same efforts. I think it is only fair that I make people aware of the unwritten work that has been done as well as my ideas I have shared on various boards.

We still invite any people who would like to talk about these things, in or out of game, to contact us wo have a talk :) We love to meet new people, and love to see what makes people interested in the game. We will continue our efforts in a more subtle way, but feel free to drop a line if you want !

Our contact info:
Jon : AIM - Alexsei Krauser
email - kazuki@globetrotter.net
Sally : AIM - Dark Siren Sally
email - ryshassa@darksiren.net
http://darksiren.net

Thanks for your time, and see you down the road.

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Alexsei Krauser, Black Wing of Eylhaar (among others)
Join the Elothean Appreciation Society ! http://elothean.darksiren.net